A Helpful Reminder

I wish to follow the good example of Dr. Esau McCaulley . . .

Like him, I, too, wish to give a helpful cheerful reminder.

I just want to remind everyone that race baiting is not a recognized Christian ministry in any orthodox denomination that I am aware of. Happy Candlemas!

You’re welcome.

The “Beauty of Holiness” or “Popish Baits”?

When I picked up Graham Parry’s Glory, Laud and Honour: The Arts of the Anglican Counter-Reformation, I expected a heavy academic read, which would have been fine as it covers a subject matter of interest to me.  

Was I wrong!  The book begins with Puritan Peter Smart’s furious indictment of John Cosin and Durham Cathedral in 1630:

…your popish baits and allurements of glorious pictures, and Babalonish vesturs, and excessive numbers of wax-candles burning at one tyme…

Ah yes, the candles.  Always the candles.  Smart was unhappy with much else as well, particularly Cosin’s “upstarting, downesquattings, east-turning, crossings and kissings” and more.

I found myself laughing uproariously.  I was reminded of the Low Churchman’s Guide to the Solemn High Mass except that Smart was quite serious.  Thus I soon discovered that Glory, Laud and Honour is not only scholarly and helpful to further study, but is actually a fun read.

And, yes, much of the fun does come from the adversarial relationship between the Puritans and the Laudians along with others who thought the worship of the Lord called for “the beauty of holiness”.  This holy combat was reflected in church architecture and furnishings and often the destruction of the same.  Parry pays not a little attention to Dowsing’s visitations of Cambridge for one thing.  And he notes that much of what we know about church furnishings under the influence of John Cosin, William Laud and cohorts comes from the Puritans’ disapproving documentation of them.

The Puritans (with an exception or two I will note another time) were rather nasty.  Beheading statues was not enough for them.  They eventually beheaded Laud, Lord of Canterbury and Charles, King and Martyr.  But (And now I will show my talent for alienating just about everybody.) the Archbishop and King in part lost their heads by not following Hooker more closely on the subject of ceremonies and images in worship.  

As Parry points out at length, Hooker approved of traditional ceremonial worship “in the bewtie of holiness,” not unlike the later Laudians, but he considered such to be adiaphora, i. e. among matters on which the faithful can and should be able to agree to disagree.  He thought parishes should be allowed discretion on details of ceremonies and ornaments as long as they stick to the Book of Common Prayer.  Further he thought disputes over such matters risk “a kinde of taking of Gods name in vaine to debase religion with such frivolous disputes, a sinne to bestowe time and labor about them.”

But neither the Laudians nor the Puritans were very interested in allowing discretion in matters of worship.  Instead they bestowed a lot of time and labor and venom upon them indeed, greatly contributing to the ugliness between them.  Many on both sides eventually paid with their lives, both on the executioner’s block and in civil war.

Well, I got rather dark there, didn’t I.  But that does not keep me from having a good laugh or two or three at their liturgical combat.  Yes, I am rather warped that way.

There is much more that is both fun and helpful about Glory, Laud and Honour, to which I may return at a later time.

It’s St. Matthias Day . . . I think.

Normal people do not know it is St. Matthias Day.

Pious people, such as my humble self, look at a church calendar and know it is St. Matthias Day.

Liturgy geeks, of which I can be after too much wine or incense or Oxford, remember it’s a Leap Year and . . . oh boy, dating St. Matthias Day gets a bit complicated.  My calendar says it’s today, but if you want to get really serious about it, you could argue it’s tomorrow, and argue and…

A reader wrote in to ask why, in the traditional rite, the feast of St Matthias the Apostle is moved from February 24th to the following day every leap year. The answer lies in the very ancient Roman calendar, which is still part of the Church’s liturgy to this day; it is used in the calendars printed at the beginning of the Missal and Breviary, and in the Martyrology, the names of the days are still read out according to the Roman system.

In the Roman calendar, each month has three days which are called the Kalends, Nones and Ides; the first of these three is the first day of each month. In March, May, July and October, the Nones are on the 7th, and the Ides on the 15th; in all other months, they are on the 5th and 13th….

The Romans named the days of each month by counting backwards from these three points. Thus, Julius Caesar was killed on the day which we call March 15, but which they called “the Ides of March”; their name for the 14th was therefore “the day before the Ides of March.” As every Latin students knows, this system becomes difficult to keep track of because the Romans counted inclusively, not exclusively; therefore, the day we call “March 13” was called “three days before the Ides of March”, (not “two days before”), including the day itself, the day before the Ides, and the Ides themselves.

Hold on, it gets better.

When the Julian Calendar was instituted in 46 BC, establishing the regular leap day every four years, the leap day itself was added by counting “the sixth day before the Kalends of March” twice. From this, the Latin term for “leap year” is “annus bisextilis”, meaning “a year in which the sixth day (before the Kalends of March) occurs twice.” This term for leap year is still used in all the Romance languages, as in Italian “anno bisestile”, and was even adopted by the Greeks, (“disekto etos” in the modern language), even though the ancient Greeks had their own very different calendar….

When the feast of St Matthias came into the Roman Rite sometime between the 9th and 11th centuries, it was fixed to this “sixth” day before the kalends of March, which we call February 24. The precise reason for this choice is unknown, but it is surely not mere coincidence that nine other months have the feast of an Apostle or Evangelist within their last ten days, thus distributing them more or less evenly through the year. In a leap year, when there are two such days, Matthias’ vigil is kept on the first of the two, and his feast on the second.

The Apostles drew lots for this? It’s enough to give the pious a headache.

Well, I am taking the easy way out.  I am sticking to the Book of Common Prayer.  I did Morning Prayer for St. Matthias Day this morning.  So there.  

Hey, love or hate Thomas Cranmer, but the man knew how to keep it simple.

Anyway, have a blessed Feast of St. Matthias . . . or Eve of the same.

30 Pieces of Cereal

Rumors that in this past Sunday’s sermon I said “thirty pieces of cereal” instead of “thirty pieces of silver” are salacious and impertinent.

I will not even dignify such calumny with a denial.

About that Mary Queen of Scots Movie…

I’ve noticed – it is hard not to notice thanks to bombardment of silly social media ads – that there is a new Mary Queen of Scots movie that portrays Queen Elizabeth I as a very mean and naughty villain who scowls a lot at Mary the heroine.  Never mind that in actual history Mary was a fool caught plotting against Elizabeth and thereby gave her little choice but to lop off Mary’s regicidal head.  And even then Elizabeth was reluctant to do so.

But during this Christmas season I wish to be full of peace and good will.  So I recommend the following presentation which I find to be more enlightening and historically accurate.  You’re welcome.

Francis and Cupich Transcend Satire

With my warped sense of humor, I should have noticed this earlier, but Weird Dave of Ace of Spades, being weird, has noticed it. (There’s handy screenshots at the link.  Scroll down to “Satire is dead.”)

Pope Francis and Cardinal Cupich have transcended satire . . . or killed it.

First, on August 16^th, the Babylon Bee posted “Pope Says He Will Address Sex Abuse Scandal Once He’s Finished Talking About Climate Change.”  It began:

In his first public statement on the horrifying, devastating report on sexual abuse within the Catholic Church, Pope Francis stated he would address the controversy in detail once he’s done talking about climate change for a few more weeks.

The head of the Roman Catholic Church claimed he is deeply concerned with the tragic report, but is “just too swamped” with work fighting climate change, criticizing capitalism, and advocating for other issues of social justice to talk about the repulsive report at the moment.

Now that is satire, just to be clear. . . . Or it was satire.

For ten days later, after the Vigano statement, Cardinal Cupich made this statement as I’ve noted:

The pope knows we have a bigger agenda. We have to speak about the environment, about the poor, we have to reach out to people who are marginalized in society. We cannot be distracted at this moment,” Cupich said.

Elsewhere, Cupich was quoted, “The Pope has a bigger agenda. … He’s got to get on with other things, of talking about the environment and protecting migrants and carrying on with the work of the church. We’re not going to go down a rabbit hole on this.”

That is not satire. . . .  Really.  I’m dead serious.  It is not satire.

Beyond that, I’ve got nothing.  How can satire survive that?

Perhaps we need a new feast day?  The Feast of the Translation of Holy Satire?

Anglican Troll of the Year

Yes, about half of 2018 remains. Yes, I have never given such an award as Anglican Troll of the Year before.  But Jules Gomes’ post supposedly reporting that the Church of England’s General Synod may abolish the Holy Trinity to make nice with Muslims demands recognition.

Yes, it was satire and hilarious, lampooning a number of parties in the Church of England.  More importantly, in spite of giveaway names in it (I particularly like “Rev’d Janus Pliable, Rector of St Simplicio’s Church, Bishopsbottom, London.”), it was such good satire that some thought it was true.  One might say it was too close to true.

 Enough thought it true that the Church of England felt it needful to state it was indeed satire:

 We are aware of a blog entitled 'Church of England's Synod may abolish Holy Trinity to include Muslims'.

 Apparently some commentators appear not to have realised the author intended it to be a joke. For the avoidance of doubt, this article is entirely without basis of fact, and is published marked as 'satire'.

 The agenda for the July 2018 General Synod can be found here, including details of all Private Member Motions listed for debate. 

The Church of England remains fully committed to the doctrine of the Trinity. 

Thus Gomes’ post and eliciting that denial from the Church of England already wins the Anglican Troll of the Year award.

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NOTE:
“Troll” often has a negative meaning. It should not be so interpreted here.  Rest assured that this award is given out of great admiration for very effective and impactful satire.  Well done, Fr. Jules!

Bad Art in Cathedrals

Dr. James Cameron has posted a fun yet appalling post on bad art in English cathedrals.  (The art appalls, not Dr. Cameron’s missive.)

Having visited Ely’s Lady Chapel at least twice, I agree that the shrieking Mary statue there is a bad joke.  But I disagree that it is the worst piece of cathedral art in England.

I have not visited Liverpool Cathedral, but the statue supposedly of the Risen Christ on the west front exceeds even Shrieking Mary in modern absurdity.  The thing reminds me much more of the big bad alien in Prometheus than of the risen Christ.

But see for yourself . . . if you dare.

Headline of the Day

To say I highly respect former Dean Robert Munday would be an understatement.  But I did not think he had it in him to pull off a brilliant lampoon.  But he did that yesterday with this headline:

Bigoted Progressive Church of Sweden Refuses To Call God By His Preferred Gender Pronouns

To troll gender lunacy and the Church of Sweden at the same time like that takes talent! 

And/or perhaps, as he notes, reality has become so absurd, it transcends humor and satire.

Do read the rest of his post, too.

A King in a Car Park? Again?

First, Richard III.  Now, Henry I?

Archaeologists have discovered what could be King Henry’s remains languishing beneath a Ministry of Justice car park on the site of Reading prison.

The bones were detected among a series of graves discovered by archaeologists using ground-penetrating radar (GPR), during an exploration of the site containing the ruins of Reading Abbey.

This is what happens when kings are not required to have parking permits.

A Jubilee Year of Predestination!

One of the more enjoyable discoveries I’ve stumbled upon in Oxford, particularly while frequenting Pusey House, is that learned English clergy tend to have a wonderful sense of humor.

Fr. Hunwicke is a case in point.  Yesterday, he suggested that after this Jubilee Year of Mercy may come a Jubilee Year of Predestination:

Perhaps another Holy Year after the present one? A Jubilee Year of Predestination? With special indulgences for Calvinists? It could be celebrated with a double Holy Door; one entry for those predestined to Heaven, the other for those predestined to Hell. Confessarii specially commissioned by the Roman Pontiff could be there to tell everybody which category they were in. I bet that would get the crowds flocking along!! Wow!

Yes, that would be wonderful indeed!

A Helpful Suggestion (not to be confused with a shameless plug)

Good day! I hope you all had a good weekend. And I especially wish a Happy Hanukkah to those who are observing that worthy celebration.

But I’ve got some good news and some bad news for you.

The good news: Christmas is just over two weeks away.

The bad news: Christmas is just over two weeks away.

Well, if you have ALL your Christmas preparation and shopping done already, maybe it's not bad news at all. But if you're normal, you probably still feel you've got too much work to do.

So let me help. My experience is that Amazon is very good about delivery. So if you order a fine book like my Texas Anglican novel Pilot Point (Hint. Hint.) about now, it will almost certainly get delivered to yourself or to your lucky gift recipient well before Christmas. And, yes, Amazon will even gift wrap it for you if you want. It doesn't get much easier than that.

And, of course, the Kindle version of Pilot Point gets delivered electronically almost immediately.

You're welcome.  Always glad to help.  Now enjoy the rest of Advent.

We’re Still Here. (And someone has some explaining to do.)

Today is October 8^th . . . which means the world was not “annihilated” on October 7^th as predicted.  I know.  Shocking.

Someone has some explaining to do.

Which should be quite fun.  How do you think the Seventh Day Adventists got started?  Probably Mr. Chris McCann will say the doom of the Earth was sealed in Heaven yesterday and the final date set for sure . . . which he intends to announce later, of course.

Funny how these supposed prophets through the years in all their dissectings and interpretations of numbers and signs and symbols and – heck, just pulling stuff out their ears – miss the obvious:

But concerning that day or that hour, no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.

Mark 13:32

But if they paid more heed to those words from the Lord . . . real words from the Lord, life continuing would be less interesting, would it not.

What This International Catholic Congress of Anglicans is About

No, ICCA really is not about vestments.  Nor have there been secret thurifer workshops that I am aware of, although I have seen some impressive 360s during processions so maybe they are practicing on the sly.  So what is this Congress about?  

I do not presume to summarize the purpose and direction of this International Catholic Congress of Anglicans myself, at least not yet.  But there have been two addresses that do summarize the direction of this conference well, both helpfully posted on YouTube by Kevin Kallsen.

Yesterday was Edith Humphrey’s address on conciliarity.  “Conciliar” has been much said at this conference.  In fact the official theme is “Restoring the Conciliar Church and Her Mission.”  But, to be honest, I’ve had trouble getting my arms around the concept.  In fact, a student asked me what "conciliar" means, and I doubt my answer was either cogent or very helpful.

Then came Humphrey’s address, which sets forth a conciliar view of the church very clearly and succinctly.

The text may be found at VirtueOnline.

This morning was an address by Bishop Keith Ackerman, most of which was reading a paper by Canon Arthur Middleton.  Bishop Ackerman said he had an address at the ready, but put it aside to let Middleton in effect speak to us.  It was a very good summary of where Anglicanism is today and some of the problems with that.

And, particularly in the bullet points towards the end of the address, I think we have heard a sneak preview of the statement to be issued towards the end of this Congress.  If so, it will be a good one indeed.

Should I come across the text online, I shall post it.

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By the way, Bishop Ackerman after reading my initial post at the conference found me out and hunted me down . . . and has exhibited an excellent and gracious sense of humor as I expected he would. 

I’m glad he got to me before the vergers. 

International Catholic Congress of Anglicans Update

I had an excellent and edifying time at the International Catholic Congress of Anglicans today, including good times with friends old and new and edifying talks and sermons.  Well, there was one sermon that even this brilliant and learned blogger did not comprehend, but I won’t mention that.

In particular, I commend to you Bishop Ray Sutton’s lecture on the Real Presence.  I could nitpick a point or two but it was on target and very accessible and winsome.

By the way the surpliced choir has sung Palestrina twice and well, which is something for a choir which first got together on Monday.  Of course, some Loyal Churchman may not be pleased about that.

Also, I wish to dispel any impression that only Anglo-Catholic Ritualists are here.  I have noticed at least two people raising hands during worship.  The vergers promptly removed them and beat them outside.

From the International Catholic Congress of Anglicans

I am writing from the International Catholic Congress of Anglicans meeting in Ft. Worth, Texas.  But nobody tell the Low Churchman.

It all began last night with Solemn Choral Evensong, and you know what the Low Churchman thinks about Solemn things.  Well, this one was more solemn than thou, especially in tat and hats.  I’ve never seen so many mitres and birettas in one place.

In fact, Bishop Keith Ackerman even wore a red biretta whilst entering the car to take him to St. Andrews.  This makes the car more visible, increasing safety, and therefore became a liturgical innovation of 20^th Century ritualists.  For wearing birettas whilst on airplanes, blue is the proper liturgical color.

Bishop Ackerman was the preacher and he gave a good sermon in which he said the Congress would not be about the proper use of vestments.  At least I think he said that as I was distracted by the large mitre he wore in the pulpit.  Yes, he took multiple liturgical hats to the Solemn Evensong.  I’m sorry to report I lost track of how many.  There were so many hats, and I was so intoxicated by incense . . . well, it was all too much for me.  They even censed the altar during the Magnificat, a disturbing practice I have never before witnessed.

On a happier note, during a more sensible said service of Morning Prayer today, Bishop Nazir-Ali taught well from Colossians 1:15-20.  It helped that he did not wear any distracting hats.

Anglican TV is here and said to be live-streaming the conference.  I do not know if trigger warnings for low churchmen have been posted.

The Democrat News Media Summarized

I could get a good rant on about the New York Times and the rest of the Democrat News Media, I really could.  But I have had trouble getting motivated to blog lately.  And my favorite political cartoonist Michael Ramirez summarizes the matter far better than I could.  So . . .

Knee Update:  The knee is worse than I had thought.  I definitely have a tear in my inside right meniscus, and it’s not a small one.  I did think I was getter better.  But it flared up badly and suddenly yesterday morning.  So it is hardly better than it was weeks ago.

Please pray for my spirits and for wisdom on how to proceed . . . and, yes, for the knee, too.

MORE:  And a friend just informed me that I likely aggravated it by kneeling.

Giving up kneeling??? What will this Anglo-Catholic do?

Church Prison

My parish has recently discovered that our baptismal font is multiple use -  and it’s a good thing, too.

 

We were at our wits’ end in dealing with naughty and irreverent children . . . until we began using our font as our Church Prison.

Not only is the miscreant (such as the naughty boy in the photo) dealt with and properly shamed, but the other children see and fear. 

Behavior has markedly improved, thanks be to God!

BOOZE – It’s What’s for Dinner!

Ah yes, what would a pre-consecration dinner in the Episcopal Diocese of Maryland be without BOOZE – and lots of it!

The timeline, which the Diocese of Maryland said Monday it had added to its Web site, says the head of the national Episcopal Church was made aware that Cook may have been drunk during her installation celebration. Presiding Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori was the leader of the Sept. 6 service that consecrated Cook, or made her a bishop [or something].

Bishop Eugene Sutton — who oversees Episcopalians in much of Maryland aside from the D.C. suburbs — suspected Cook was “inebriated during pre-consecration dinner,” the timeline says, “and conveys concern to Presiding Bishop. Presiding Bishop indicates she will discuss with Cook. Cook consecrated.”

You’re darn right she was consshhecrated!  You can’t separate an Anglican from her BOOZE, and that goesth double for Heather Cook!

Katharine Schori and Heather Cook and ALL (hic) good Episcopalians agree!  BOOZE – It’s what’s for dinner!

An Update

This morning, a good-humored young woman at Goodreads graciously responded to my letter and notified me that I am no longer the author of Big Boobs but only of Pilot Point and God Knows What It’s Like to be a Teenager.

Well, that was fun while it lasted.