Someone needs to have a chat with this gentleman about Advent and the rhythms of the church year . . . among other things.
Andy, who is known as Mr Christmas and has celebrated it every day for the past 17 years, claims he's "serious" about wanting to marry his Christmas tree.
The divorcee, from Melksham, Wilts, admits many will think he's had too much sherry but that hasn't stopped him drawing up plans for the ceremony.
He said: "I love my Christmas tree more than anything else, so that's why I want to marry it.
"I've already got a ring, although I'm not sure yet which branch I'll want to hang it on.
"The only problem seems to be finding a vicar who is willing to do the ceremony."
Andy, have you asked the Rev. Martin Dudley? And if he won’t do it, then do we across the pond have the “church” for you!